Who I Am
This is a little book of fantasies that I’ve written
over the past two years. Every woman has
fantasies; every man has fantasies. Travel with me
on a written journey as we explore them together
and perhaps someday some of your own fantasies
may come true.
Getting to Know Each Other
Sometimes not being with someone you’re attracted
to can build up a tension and frustration that causes
harsh things to be said. Why that is she wouldn’t
know. She only knows that they have reached a
point lately where the intensity of their talks
brought out some raw emotions. Who knew that
even phone makeup sex could be so powerful?
They’re retreating and stepping forward and
repeating the process over and over. He shares his
other dates with her; she answers the phone when
he calls regardless of who she’s with or where she’s
at.
Her mantra these days seems to be an old 70s song.
It used to remind her of losing her first love, now it
reminds her that she dumped someone because of
unresolved feelings for someone else. If she were
totally honest, she could probably be sporting a
ring. She doesn’t want a ring. She wants an
obsession.
The sexual tension has gotten so thick…they talk
into the night…going back and forth between
frustration and clarity; asking questions that lead to
more questions and more tension. Building in
emotion that brings with it arousal and explosion.
One wonders where it all will end. Or begin.
A Little More
Everything was being whispered in the dark as she
lay in her bed talking to him. What started out as a
lark between two friends...fulfilling a need in the
night as each were alone...went from just sexual to
something more.
Life got in the way of the loneliness as they began
exploring the dark corners of each other's souls.
Like two poker players calling each other's bluff,
they brought their warts and issues to the table.
Neither player folding; each called by the other for
the hand they were holding.
He has his female friends and she has her male
friends but the feelings they danced around during
the night were powerful and intense. She longed to
be next to him in the dark; to not just whisper the
words that would make him cum but to take him
there with the touch of her own hand.
She longed to make his deepest desires and familiar
fantasies come true. They were both scared, though;
he, of letting someone that close; she, the same,
letting someone that close.
And More
She didn’t quite reach the cell phone. She pushed
call back and it was him. They'd been talking for a
few days. They knew each other longer through the
complex where they lived but had only recently
found a connection.
She liked his voice. She wouldn’t deny it. The call
was actually a surprise. She sat in the middle of the
laundry room folding towels and talking to this man
who only days ago had seemed so inaccessible.
They chatted about a comment made earlier in the
day about him going to the bank and thinking
about...her. They were dancing around each other
yet opening up as well. She was anyway. She
wasn’t quite sure about him. Not just yet but it was
good to keep her guessing.
They talked about every day subjects but there was
an undercurrent of sensuality there. She wasn’t so
naive as to think there could ever be anything
serious between them yet she found herself thinking
about him at the oddest times of the day. It truly
surprised her when he told her she had been in his
thoughts as well.
They had agreed to the rules of the game. It was all
in fun. The paths their lives had taken made it hard
for it to be serious and besides, they were both
intelligent enough and mature enough to know the
difference.
So why did he keep invading her thoughts when it
was just a game. Wasn’t it?
The Question
He asked her once why she liked him so much.
“Because I can be all of who I am with you and not
just a part.”
He liked that because it meant she wasn't judging
him, either. They smiled at each other. She took off
the hunter green camisole and walked naked
towards him.
”Let's have some of that cock we've been hearing so
much about.”
The ringing phone woke her up. Was last night just
a dream or did they finally connect? She didn't
know but sometimes fulfilling a little fantasy really
is nice.
”Hello? No I don’t want to change my long
distance carrier.”
She was awake; might as well get up but she felt the
difference in her energy that day and she knew the
real reason why she was smiling.
The Movie
She hadn’t been to a movie in forever. Being a
single mom of two kids didn’t do a lot for one’s
love life but they were with their father for the
summer now. She didn’t have to feel bad about the
dinner date; .there was no one to go home to.
They went for steak at his favorite restaurant and
then to see a movie. A suspense-drama with a
leading man who reminded her a little of her ex.
They were about halfway through the movie when
he put his hand on her thigh. She had worn a dress
having met him right after work.
He casually started rubbing on her leg. She glanced
over at him but he seemed to be concentrating on
the movie.
My imagination she thinks.
She goes back to sipping her soda and watching the
leading man fill up the screen. The rubbing gets a
little more persistent; the heat from his hand
permeating through the fabric of her dress.
She doesn’t notice but her breathing is a little
quicker; a little more shallow and he slowly moves
his hand up her thigh taking the fabric with him....
'Baby, I've wanted to take you out for awhile...
Shhh...the movie... she whispers back.
”Baby,” and his hand is there; right where her heat
is centered.
”Come on, baby.”
Oh yeah
She'd see the movie on girls night; the leading man
was worth it.
And they left the theater.........................
Storms
They were sitting on the couch watching a movie
when he heard her breathing grow more rapid. He
had been expecting that when the storm wandered
in that evening. Storms in general did that to her;
turned her on. He could feel the heat emanating
from her as they watched the characters clinging to
life on the ship. It wouldn't be long now; why do
you think he chose that movie? He knew her so
well.
She turned to him; her hands reaching out to touch
him; unzipping his jeans without hesitation. The
storm was playing out on their big screen TV and
the home theater surround sound brought it right
into their living room and the music from the show
moved within her.
He grabbed her face between his hands and leaned
in to kiss her.
'I love you, woman..'
I love you, too, now shhh....quiet...
Her moans grew deeper as she got down from the
couch and centered herself between his legs. He
loved when they watched movies about storms but
not as much as when their own coastal town had
them. There was something about storms that
brought out the sexual beast in his wife of fourteen
years.
Without skipping a beat she began stroking his balls
and tickling them with her lips and tongue. He
moaned as she took him in her mouth, taking him
just a little deeper with each stroke.
Man he loved storms!!!
Last Night’s Shower
She was sitting at the vanity putting her makeup on
when he tapped at the bathroom door.
"Honey, I need to jump in the shower quick."
Come on in, baby, door's open.
He came in with a towel wrapped around him and
as he started adjusting the water temperature,
looked over at her.
"Baby, come on in with me."
Now? Honey, I need to get ready or we'll be late
meeting everyone for dinner.
"So? Let’s get clean together."
I am clean, baby.
"All the better."
His smile melted her heart. He could make her do
anything with that look. She stood up and slowly
started taking her dress back off. He was already in
the shower watching her as she pulled her bra and
panties off.
In the shower she helped him soap his body then he
pulled her towards him to help her wash as well by
rubbing his soapy physique up and down hers.
They stood facing each other; her breasts pressed
against his chest. As he started kissing her neck she
moaned.
"How do you want it, Baby?"
You know how
'Yes, I do, turn around."
She turned and he bent her over and drove his eight
inches into her. She moaned louder and he said
“tell me how do you want it.'
Harder baby, harder and faster.
They reached a crescendo as they came together,
oblivious to the ringing of the phone.
Her Thoughts on Paper
I’m not good at speaking my thoughts out loud.
Emotions get the best of me and I start to lose track
of what I said and what I still need to say. I do so
much better when I write for some reason. If I have
ever had an addiction in life, I'm starting to think I
have one to you. And I know you’re going to read
that and laugh but it’s true.
I want you to want to touch me.
Perhaps out at dinner or better yet…
a movie...and I've wanted to see it for so long...this
movie but all I can think about is you next to me
and wondering…
Does he like me?
Does he want me?
I try to force myself to “just get over it" but I’m not
good at that, as you can tell. Or can you?
And I want you to pull me to you and whisper in my
ear while we're at that movie…
about how you can't wait to get me home so you can
be inside of me....
answering the question: yes. yes. Yes! He wants
me!
Yes, I can be a hussy but only for you.
And I want you to touch me...
fondle me...
rub up against me when the kids aren't looking.
Does any of this make sense? Or is it too much?
I don't know.
People say when you get older passion fades, but it
hasn't in me.
I keep waiting for it to. But I feel more passionate
now than I have my entire life because of you.
Every day I think about how wonderful it would
feel to be completely naked and have you laying on
top of me, inside of me, your chest pressed against
mine, your mouth all over my breasts, my neck, my
earlobes.
Or I think about sitting in that theater next to you
with your finger buried inside of me, rubbing me
until I cum quietly.
Or I think about driving somewhere, anywhere, and
unzipping your pants and putting you in my mouth
and then finding a quiet road somewhere...where we
can hop in the backseat of your car and well...just
fuck.
Or I think about you climbing on top of me, putting
your hard dick between my breasts, and making
love to them.
Or I think about waking up to the feeling of you
inside me, walking around the rest of the day
feeling that delicious, sore "I just got fucked by my
man" feeling.
Or I think about answering my cell phone on my
way home with you telling me the fantasies you
have had about me during the day...and then living
out those fantasies later.
I think about all of this. I think about you.
I think about us. I think about making our fantasies
come true.
Yes, I'm a hussy…but only for you.
His Thoughts on Paper
Baby, you and I are of the same mind.
I always considered myself to be a little emotionally
stand-offish. Yet I am not with you. I am crazy
about you.
When you say that you are addicted to me, I don't
think it's silly or laughable. I know you are
terrified.
You hesitate to tell me things about yourself, and
you tell me at every turn that you can find me a
suitable companion when you are feeling insecure
or uncertain about the way I might feel.
Listen up! I'm still here. You will not drive me
away. My body aches for you; waiting for my body
to stiffen with desire under your touch. To feel your
soft lips kissing mine. Feeling your supple skin no
matter where I touch.
I do want to touch you and only you.
When we are in that theater, trying to watch that
movie, you will know how much I like you and how
much I want you. I think about it every single day.
Will I thrill this girl to the bone or just be a
disappointment? Will I be everything she wants in
a man? Will I be able to satisfy her like we
fantasize about? I want to be and do all these to
you.
I want to cum deep inside you, to feel the
satisfaction of making you mine. I want to cum on
you in the morning, and watch you massage my
manly liquid into your skin, leaving my scent on
you all day marking my woman. I and want to cum
in you mouth to watch you enjoy my taste as you
swallow it with a devilish smile on your face.
I want only you to do these things for me.
You can tell me any desire or nasty thought you
may have or fantasize about and I assure you that I
will not laugh or embarrass you. Call me anytime
day or night. Soon you will be able to do it face to
face.
You want to be deeply desired by me. You
are…and you are my hussy; only mine. I want to
do every little thing you mentioned and more, so
much more. I feel just as passionate as I did when I
was 18, all because of you.
Do You Remember?
Do you remember that moment in time?
When I first met you that night?
Would you have thought we’d be here today?
Anticipating our very first date.
We talk for hours on the phone late at night;
Making our plans, we want them just right.
Sometimes we forget our lips haven’t touched;
How can two strangers miss each other this much?
Unspoken promises…do we really dare?
To fulfill in reality the dreams that we’ve shared.
Butterflies abound when I think of you;
You tell me you’re feeling it, too.
Chemistry’s more than a class taught in school;
What we’re doing now breaks all my rules.
Whatever may happen I want you to know;
I don't regret the risk of letting him go.
You were there before he came along;
Calling my soul with a mystical song.
Whatever may happen, upon this please depend;
No matter the outcome, you've made a new friend.
School’s Out
School's out...kids are off doing their thing....mom's
got some free time...wondering if this "thing" that's
going on is real or a summer dalliance. She's had a
thing for him since early spring...and now he's just
starting to notice.
She's lying on her bed in the late night, red lace
camisole set....talking to him on the phone; the tone
of his voice so sexy that her hand inevitably starts
massaging her breasts...moving down to the center
of her passion. Because just the sound of his voice
can arouse her...cause her to touch herself in ways
and places she's not even aware of until she feels
the wetness.
He hears her moan. He knows what's going
on...hears it in her whispers in the dark....and as
they talk each other through to mutual satisfaction,
he says "Baby?"
"Yes?"
"I wish I were there....inside you."
"Me, too, baby, me too."
And soon, they plan that meeting...and she can
almost feel him right there beside her as she drifts
off to sleep.
First Date, Second Date
He thinks: There she is...I wonder if she'll like
me...I wonder if I'll like her.
She thinks: Does my hair look all right? Should I
have worn a different shirt?
They cross the parking lot and greet each other and
walk into the restaurant. Both are a little nervous.
They picked Chinese...a good sign that they both
like it, right?
They order the buffet and iced tea and go to fix their
plates. And when they sit down, they look at each
other. And then they smile.
And three and a half hours later, they finally get up
to leave. He asks her...can I see you again? There's
this concert on Tuesday night.
I'd like to but I already have plans that night.
Really, I'm not brushing you off, I just do.
She goes home to find an IM waiting...I loved your
eyes...I had a great time.
And then it's Friday and they've made plans to see a
movie. He's thought about her all week. She's
thought about him, too. They know there's a
connection but is it enough?
They sit in the dark of the theater and he turns to
her..."look, I just want to kiss you now, I need to
kiss you." He doesn't wait for a response, he just
does it.
And she's kissing him back. And the movie is
forgotten for the moment as they explore each
other's tongues and lips. He reaches for her but she
holds back...I really would like to watch the movie.
And they watch the comedy playing out on the big
screen before them and he thinks he's going to
explode if he doesn't kiss her again soon. And she
wonders if she went too far by kissing him like that.
As they step back out in the dark after the movie he
takes her hand, pleased that she doesn't pull away.
He walks her to her side of the car and as he
unlocks it, he leans in and kisses her again. She
leans in to him and their breathing becomes more
rapid as they explore each other's lips and mouths
and necks and he stops. He looks at her, "Will you
come home with me?"
Tremors
She feels them when she least expects it...like little
movements of the earth that were the norm in
California. Only here there are no earthquakes...just
tremors when a touch makes both people aware of
whom they are...a woman...and a man.
She likes the way they make her feel...reminding
her that she's a woman...that someone finds her
attractive...that someone would push the envelope if
she would be willing.
Like at the local speedway. When her nephew's car
hits the finish line first just as the flag lowers, and
she is so exuberant. She screams and hugs her
friends and one of them holds onto the hug just a
little longer and they look into each other's eyes.
But then the crowd's excitement takes over and the
moment is gone. Tremors.
Like at the mall when she runs into a friend from
church. She's not in a dress, he's not in a suit and
tie...just two people in jeans out with their kids...he
has his for the weekend...she has hers. Of course
being teenagers in the same youth program, they
run off together so the two friends grab a cup of
coffee.
"How has your summer been?"
"Good. Ready for school to start?"
"Yes."
Out of the blue he asks her about seeing a movie
that's been all the rage over the summer.
"No, I haven't seen that."
"Would you like to?"
Just as the kids run up and ask for money to get a
snack and the moment is gone. Tremors.
Out dancing with friends...at the sporting goods
store...a man she doesn't know putting the gas in her
car...all sharing eye contact and a moment of
tremors. Leaning in to ask what her perfume
is...leaning in to remove a piece of lint from her
hair...leaning in for a kiss. Tremors.
Tremors are good. They make her aware of who she
is and where she's at. They make her feel good
about herself and about life. Light flirtations abound
all around both off and online. Tremors are little
warning signs that something could most definitely
happen if both parties are willing. Tremors are filled
with excitement and a touch of fear...wondering
where it will go and how it will end.
She's not too concerned, though. When one of them
melts her butter...THAT'S when the tremors will
turn into earthquakes!
Kiss Massage
He said, "I want to give you a kiss massage."
She asked him, 'What's a kiss massage?"
So he showed her.
Starts at the soles of her feet...kisses them...tickles
her toes with his tongue...and sucks them
lightly...runs his tongue up the backs of her
legs...her calves first...massaging one while kissing
the other...then switching off...the insides of her
knees...the backs of her thighs...massaging and
kneading gently...kissing and licking...reaching that
erotic spot where her thighs meet her butt
cheeks...tracing the edges with his tongue...slipping
down to tease; running it up the crack and planting
more kisses and using massaging fingers all over at
the same time...Mmmmmm...loving it...getting
turned on by her moans...which makes him go ever
deeper and more forbidden....running a loving
tongue and mouth all over her naked ass...covering
it and all with kisses....reaching lightly underneath
to touch her softly .....moving up...using his tongue
to dig deep on her spine and make it
shiver...massaging her back as he kisses it from side
to side...not missing a spot...deep, deep sucking
kisses with a backrub naturally silky and
nice....paying special attention to her shoulders and
neck when he gets there....pressing lightly but
firmly on the back...on the right spots...to send chill
bumps up and down, while nuzzling her earlobes
and breathing softly...sucking them lightly, biting
them gently....turning her gently to gaze into her
eyes....only half done....kissing her lashes, the tip of
her nose...moving down to trace and lick her
lips...fingers already running up and down her
sides...butterfly kisses....puts a finger to her
lips...not finished yet, precious.....kisses her throat
softly just at the touch of the scar and gives her a
light hickey....massaging her breasts...her nipples
...leaning down to suck them...swirling his tongue
around them...nibbling gently...biting ever so
neatly....his hands and fingers down
below....seductively tickling the insides of her
thighs...as his hair tickles her chest and he's licking
her ever lower and lower...covering her tummy with
kisses...a tongue inside her belly
button....tickling...lips down her thighs...the inside