SHATTERED
An erotic novel written by Theresa McDonal
Smashwords Edition
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners
Smashwords Edition License Notes:
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Copyright 2010 Theresa McDonal
CHAPTER ONE
He sat silently slumped over, his head in his hands. His fingers tightened around his skull and he squeezed. He was in a predicament and quite unsure about what to do next, how to proceed. He was oddly aware of his heart beating in his chest and took a deep breath. Funny he should be conscious of that since it was his heart he was worried about. Nearly six months ago he fell in love with a woman and there was absolutely nothing wrong with that except for the fact that he was engaged to someone else and going to be married. He closed his eyes and breathed evenly through his nose. Finally he sat up and ran his fingers into his long, auburn, curly hair. He scratched his head vigorously and then sighed. The woman he was engaged to was beautiful; loved and wanted by many men. She was an actress in Hollywood and made movies with big stars such as Jack Nicholson, Brad Pitt, and Matthew McConaughey. He supposed he was lucky to have her at all. They had been dating for about two years now and though he wasn't keen on the idea, many people suggested that marriage was the next step. He had thought about it and even went so far as to make a list of pros and cons; he had more cons than pros on the list but he was advised that it would be the best for his own career that he marry her. He proposed the next week. Now the wedding was coming up. It wasn't that he didn't love her; he did … it was just that he had this nagging problem with being hopelessly in love with someone else. And there was a huge difference between loving someone and being in love … right? He hadn’t planned on falling in love with the other woman. He was sure it was her fault that he had anyway so if anyone was to blame for this mishap if you will, it would be her. She was enchanting and had obviously cast a spell on him. The worst thing about it all was that she was his fiancée’s best friend so he'd known her for quite some time as well but being as he was a singer and away on tour most of the duration of his relationship with said actress he hadn't really gotten to know the best friend very well until he was finally off tour and his fiancée was finished filming for the time being and they were able to spend some quality time together. After being away from each other so long they spent the first two weeks together in a hotel in Mexico making love like animals. He didn't even know why he bothered to take her someplace as beautiful and scenic as Mexico when they spent the whole time inside of a small room. They ate very little and pawed at each other a whole lot. After two weeks he was exhausted and glad to be getting back to real life again. Thirsty for excitement and not necessarily the kind you got in the bedroom under the covers either, he needed something to do, something fun. Enter the best friend and after spending a week with his fiancée and her best friend he discovered that he had feelings for the best friend. Sure, he suppressed it for a while, telling himself it was a childish crush, a passing phase - and when it didn't dissipate right away like it should have, like he wished it had, he reasoned that it had to be cold feet. Cold feet, huh? He said to himself but out loud. The sound of his own voice amidst the silence startled him and made him jump. He pushed himself up off the couch and began to pace the condo. Looking around he sighed sadly. In a few weeks he would be a married man and his fiancée would become a permanent resident here. She'd clutter his walls with photos and paintings, apply her female touch and in the blink of an eye there would be vases of flowers everywhere. He sighed. And it wasn't even the fact that she would 'pretty up' the place because any woman he married would do the same, he was just depressed about having to marry her, knowing he had to marry her while his heart was the possession of someone else. Someone else who had absolutely no idea she held something so fragile, so precious.
Jake went to the kitchen and stuck his head inside the refrigerator looking for something, anything, he didn't know what. He spied a can of beer, grabbed it, cracked it open then took a gulp. It tasted wonderful. He took another. While he was on tour he wasn't allowed to drink alcohol. It could potentially ruin his voice so he just abstained. He'd worked too long and too hard to get where he was to ruin it with something as transient as an alcohol buzz. After a while he didn't even miss it. But now, as he downed another swig he remembered how much he enjoyed a beer now and then. Beer wasn't even as good when you were drinking it as it was when you'd finished and you were left with that malted, whole grain taste on your palate and your tongue says, hey, that was so good I'd like to have another. He finished the can of beer then fished around for another. He opened that one too and took another swig then headed back into the living room and plopped back down on the couch where he'd been most of the day. He had to decide to do something but he was at as loss to what. He sighed and found himself staring off into space, thinking of her. He could see her clearly as if she was standing right in front of him, her slender, pixie face, cute little upturned nose, bright blue eyes - she had long, blonde hair that hung down her back in loose waves. Her lips were plump and pink and even more delectable when she smeared sparkly lip gloss on them. More then once he fought off an urge to run his tongue over them and see what they taste like. Over time it had gotten harder and harder to be around her - as soon as she'd enter the room or call on the phone his body responded and well, he didn't want to brag but he considered himself somewhat well endowed and when he became aroused it was fairly apparent. You didn't even have to look hard to notice. Yeah, it had gotten to be a problem. Add to that the fact that she was a novelist - and the novels she wrote; erotic fiction. That certainly didn't help matters at all. Bored one day while fiancée and best friend were out shopping he picked up one of her novels that his fiancée had left by the bedside and began to read. After a few paragraphs he was riveted; he'd never read anything more sensual in all his life. He ended up with the book in the bathroom that day and then a few times after that. He'd picture the heroine in the story as the best friend and the male seducer as himself. He sat back and felt himself stiffen. He rolled his eyes, disgusted at himself that she had that power over him. She was only a woman after all ... a very beautiful woman, who had a sweet, seductive laugh, an alluring smile, a desirable body, and a bewitching smile. He groaned as he grew larger. He rested his hand on it and then adjusted himself until he was in a more comfortable position. He picked up his cell phone that sat next to the couch on an end table and flipped it open. Scrolling through the names and numbers he had stored he stopped at her name and stared at it. Alexandra Portico. Alex to her friends. Allie to him. Jake smiled. What he wouldn't give for a good excuse to call her right then. Just to hear her voice, hear her giggle into his ear. If he was a real man he would just come right out and tell her how he felt about her. He frowned. Well he was a real man but sadly there was also another piece to the puzzle and that piece was Allie's own fiancé, Derek. He hated thinking of him and the fact that in one week she would be his property. He clenched his teeth and began to bite his lip. She hadn't been dating this guy long, certainly not as long and he and his fiancée Jovie had been dating but it was apparent that he loved her because four months into the relationship he gave her a gaudy diamond and asked her to marry him. Jake thought he was going to die a slow death when Allie proudly showed off her ring and her fiancé, also a singer, slipped his arm around her shoulder and grinned victoriously. It was as if he was flaunting a prized trophy. Jake had forced himself to smile and give him a congratulatory handshake but then he turned to Allie and pulled her into him for a hug. He would never forget that moment as she slipped her arms around his waist and pressed herself to him. His body reacted instantly but he didn't pull away, instead he whispered softly into her ear, "Congratulations. I hope you'll be happy." He breathed in deeply the sweet scent of her perfume, a combination of lavender and vanilla and closed his eyes. She pulled away blushing a moment later. He stood up now and stalked off to the kitchen, frustrated and dejected and tossed his can of beer into the sink. "Dammit." He sputtered, grabbed his jacket and headed out the door for a long walk; he needed to work off some of the angry energy that consumed him before he would explode.
CHAPTER TWO
This was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, wasn't it? Well it certainly had become memorable already and the wedding ceremony hadn't even started yet, but happy? The jury was still out on that one ... Alexandra stood in the women's bathroom in the lobby of one of the fanciest, most expensive hotels in Las Vegas and stared at her own reflection in the mirror. She was getting married to a wonderful, handsome man not too long from then in the largest banquet hall in the hotel. She was resplendent in her princess bridal gown. Her hair was perfectly coiffed upwards into a pony tail that cascaded down through the diamond encrusted tiara she wore and down to her shoulders then pooled onto her bare back just under her shoulder blades. Her makeup had been applied to perfection; her cheeks rosy, her eyes bright blue and sparkling. She glanced at the clock behind her on the wall; the ceremony was to begin any moment and her handsome pop star husband-to-be would be waiting nervously at the altar ... So why was she staring at the reflection of someone who's heart had just been torn in two instead of waiting for her cue to begin walking up the aisle? The heartbreak started only 10 minutes before when she left the safety of the bride's room to rush down the hall for a last minute bathroom break when she was greeted by a handsome friend of hers Jake Conroy.
"Where are you headed?" He asked as he met her in the hallway, her dress billowing around her as she tried to breeze swiftly down the hall for a quick tinkle before the ceremony was to start.
"Bathroom." She said. He laughed softly.
"Nervous bladder?" He teased. She sighed and nodded.
"Nervous everything." She said and eyed the door to the women's room only 500 feet away.
"Hey, can I tell you something?" He asked, his hands clasped together in front of his chest. He was dressed formally in a three piece dark blue suit, tie, and crisp, white shirt. His dark, curly hair was combed to perfection, but his usual warm, generous eyes were distant, nervous. Alex dropped the hem of her dress, her arm was getting tired of holding it up and her hands were sweating in the satin gloves that covered her arms up to her elbows.
"Of course you can. Is something wrong?" She asked cautiously. Jake and his fiancée, also Alex's best friend Jovie Jensen were scheduled to be married in the same banquet room of the same hotel the very next week and the way he fidgeted in front of her now she had an awful feeling what he had to tell her may have something to do with that. He now ran a hand through his curls, took a deep breath and exhaled slowly through pursed lips. "What is it, Jake?" She asked urgently, not only did she have to pee but the wedding was to start any minute now.
"Ummm ..." he looked at her then looked away. Forcing himself to look at her again their eyes met and he held her there. "I, uhh, I ... I don’t know how to say this.”
“Just spit it out.” She said anxiously.
“I … I love you." He said suddenly and so quietly she wasn't sure she’d actually heard what she thought she did.
"You what?" She said, confused. His eyes bore into her and for a moment she was sure he could see right through her and beyond.
"I love you, Allie. I want you so badly that it hurts." She sighed and looked down at the floor.
"Jake ..." She said in desperation. He slid his hands around the sides of her head and after glancing up and down the hallway making sure no one was looking he turned her head up to his.
"I can't help it, its how I feel."
"How long have you felt like this?" She asked, her eyes searching his for answers.
"A long time." He whispered.
"How long?"
"Does it matter? What matters is that I want you. I want to kiss you. Can I kiss you? Just once before you marry him." She closed her eyes as his mouth descended upon hers, his lips first brushing hers sending shivers up and down her spine then he pressed them more urgently against hers. Her arms were pinned to her sides by fright though she had an urge to slip them around his waist. Her whole being was paralyzed by his kiss and a fear of being caught. After an endless moment he pulled back slightly. "You are so beautiful. Tell me that kiss didn't mean something to you?" Alex said nothing, just kept her eyes closed breathing heavily into his face. "Would you like to sneak away and have a moment before the ceremony?" He whispered. Her eyes popped open and she frowned. "Okay, forget that. I know you have to go but this is far from over Allie. Just don't forget how I feel about you." He pressed his mouth to hers once more for a deep seated kiss that included his tongue wiggling its way between her lips and mingling briefly with hers. He dropped his hands from her head and took a step backwards. Alex swooned. Jake reached out and held her by the shoulders. "Are you going to be okay?" He asked. She cleared her throat and swallowed hard.
"Umm yeah. I think so." She said softly before turning and literally sprinting to the women's room, pushing the door open and slipping inside.
The wedding went off as planned and Alexandra did her best to put the recent declaration of love from Jake in the back of her mind during the ceremony but there he was, in the corner of her eye, watching, waiting. During the reception she was on guard … he was bound to corner her and though she expected it, she was apprehensive so whenever she needed to go to the bathroom she always made sure she dragged someone with her. First it was her mother, and then it was Jovie. Next, her cousin Sally. In any case, it worked. The only time she was alone with Jake was when he asked her to dance. Reluctantly she obliged. He slipped his arm around her and pulled her out onto the dance floor.
“You’re avoiding me.” He said as the music played and their bodies swayed slowly to the tempo. Alex cleared her throat and glanced up at him.
“No, Jake, no I’m not.” He laughed softly.
“You are too.” She smiled demurely, her lips glistening in the dim light. He ached to lean down and kiss her again. Once was definitely not enough. “So what will you do with the information I provided a few hours ago?” She shrugged.
“I don’t know Jake, what should I do with it?” Her indigo eyes peered up at his and he was enchanted once more by her.
“Well …” he rolled his tongue around inside his mouth. “You could sneak away with me tonight, we could just disappear the two of us.” He said it as joke outwardly but inwardly he hoped she would take him up on it. And he would really do it if she said yes. Instead she tipped her head back and laughed.
“I don’t think so.” She mused. He smiled. “I happen to love my husband.” Her words hit him like a punch in the chest and his breath caught in his throat. He coughed slightly.
“Well I happen to love you.” He whispered and watched as her cheeks flushed pink.
“You don’t love Jovie?” She asked through gritted teeth. It was his turn to blush.
“Well, yeah. Did I say I didn’t?” Her eyes flashed angrily.
“All this stuff about me gives me the idea that you don’t.” He shook his head. It was on the chopping block right at that moment and it wasn’t very comfortable. He tightened his grip around her waist as though she would disappear into thin air and he would be left standing foolishly alone.
“That’s not true. I do love her. It’s just that …” He looked down at her. Her eyes captured his gaze and held him there. He was dumbfounded and felt a whole new wave of emotion wash over him, tears collected on his lower lid and he blinked them away.
“It’s just that what? I’m waiting for your answer.” He shook his head and looked away. “Just as I thought. You don’t love her. Then why are you marrying her?” He had already revealed that, bared his soul to her in the hallway, kissed her and risked being caught … why was she asking again when she said she didn’t want to hear it?
“I already explained that to you.” She sighed and looked over his shoulder at her new husband who was perched on the end of the bridal table; his tie loosened and turned to one side as he chatted with Jovie who was brilliant in her cobalt blue maid of honor dress. Her heart ached for Derek. What would he say if he knew the conversation she was having at that very moment, at their wedding reception of all places with Jake? She couldn’t risk losing him.
“Jake … I appreciate the fact that you came to me and told me how you feel but I …” she hesitated and looked up at him. He was so handsome in his suit and tie, his eyes bright and glistening, attentive and waiting to hear what she had to say. His hair swirled around his head in dark waves; the light shining over his head filtered through the curls and lit them up. He looked like an angel right then and there and she sighed again. She was torn between telling him to back off and not wanting to hurt his feelings either. It was a brave thing he did earlier that day by confessing his feelings about her and the courage it must have taken had to have been called up from the deepest recesses of his inner self but she couldn’t let him come between her and her new husband. “This just can’t go any further. Marry Jovie, have babies, be happy.” He stared at her emotionless. It was getting too difficult to talk about it any more. He had to get away before he said something or did something he would regret. He stopped moving and released her.
“Well I can marry her and we could possibly have babies … but without you the last thing you said can’t and won’t happen.” She took a deep breath but before she could say anything he brushed past her and out the door.
Alex looked over at Derek and smiled when she felt his hand slip inside hers. She had been staring out the window of the airplane as they hovered over the clouds on their way to Hawaii for their honeymoon.
“Everything okay?” He asked with an obvious Australian intonation. He was born and raised there but had moved to California not too long ago and luckily for her hadn’t lost that sexy inflection. She nodded.
“Yeah, I’m great, you?” He sighed and kissed her fingers.
“I am now that the wedding is over with. Boy was I nervous.” She laughed softly. She was nervous too, but for a different reason the he had been.
“I know what you mean. I couldn’t breathe halfway through it.” He nodded.
“Hey, I was thinking that we should look for a house now. What do you think?” She frowned thoughtfully.
“You think we should get into a house? Right away?” He smiled and nodded, his thick luscious lips pushing back and baring his bright, white, Hollywood teeth. She raised her eyebrows and shrugged.
“Well, I guess so.” He winked one twinkling blue eye at her.
“Excellent.” He pulled his hand from hers and slipped it around her shoulder. “I love you, Alex.” He said softly and then leaned down for a kiss. She tilted her head and met his lips with her own. They were warm and soft. He pulled her closer as his kisses became inflamed. She reached up and slid her fingers into his tight, blonde curls. “God, I can’t wait to get to the hotel and make love to my wife.” He whispered and shifted uncomfortably in his seat. She grinned.
“I can’t wait either.” She said and rested her head on his chest.
“Look at this Derek!” She gushed pushing open the white sheers that covered the sliding glass door in the hotel room.
“What?” He asked setting down their suitcases and coming up behind her. He placed his hands on her shoulders and leaned down so that his head was even with hers as he peered out at what she was looking. “It’s marvelous.” He breathed. Their room was right on the beach overlooking the ocean. There was a cape not far away. The green grass tumbled slightly over the edge of it changing to black volcanic rock. As the ocean crashed against them it left an austere white foam that evaporated quickly.
“I can’t wait to get out there!” She squealed. He turned her around and slid his fingers around her neck and traced the outline of her jaw with his thumbs lightly.
“Do you want to consummate this marriage first …” he whispered and kissed her pouting lips lightly a few times. “Or would you like to change into your suit and head out to the beach?” She held her breath as his lips brushed against hers then kissed down her chin and back up. She ran her hands up the back of his loose, button-down Hawaiian print shirt and raked her nails along his taught back. Her mouth pressed against his feverishly as she traced the outline of his muscles with the tips of her fingers then worked their way around to his chest where she slid them into the hair that matted it.
“How about we look at the beach later?” She whispered and trailed her hands down to waistband of his jean shorts then fiddled with the zipper. He pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it aside as she pushed his shorts down freeing his already hard manhood. “Oh, Derek …” she sighed and took him into her hands. He gasped at the stark contrast in the temperature of her cool fingers against the heat of his shaft. He unhooked her bra and pulled it off her dipping his head first to one firm nipple then the other. Her head dropped back and she moaned. He ran his hands down her back and as he held her pushed her backwards so he could gain better access to her. He sucked the nipple between his lips and flicked his tongue against it before kissing downwards towards her belly button. In one swift motion he scooped her into his arms and carried her to the massive king-sized bed and laid her gently upon it.
“I think these are in the way …” he said with a wink and slid her shorts down her hips and tossed them away taking her panties with them. Without bothering to unbutton the shirt he pulled it up and over his head then crawled on top of her. “Well, Mrs. Harris,” he began leaning down and kissing her with devotion. “Looks like I’ve got you where I want you.” He winked and began to kiss her all over starting with her neck then working his way down her body slowly, teasingly leaving tiny wet pucker marks all over her skin like a snail trail. She shivered and burst out in goose bumps. When he finally got to her hips she was panting. He kissed down and around her trimmed, furry patch then pushed her thighs apart and began to lick them.
“Oh God, Derek, you are such a tease!” She gushed as his tongue lapped on the inside of her thigh right where her leg and her torso met. He settled himself down on the bed and with a finger traced the outline of the lips between her legs spreading her wetness all around.
“And it’s quite obvious that you like it.” He whispered as his fingers slipped just inside and brushed against her clitoris. She gasped. “Oh that’s the spot is it?” He said, tantalizing her by removing the finger and pressing his tongue against it. He moved it ever so slightly. She closed her eyes and moaned.
“Don’t stop.” She breathed heavily and reached down to his head sliding her fingers into his hair.
“Don’t stop?” He asked pulling back and smiling.
“Derek!” She snapped. He chuckled and slipped his tongue inside her once more. Once he was finished playing he set his tongue to work licking, flicking against her and then finally lapping at a steady pace against her now hardened and throbbing clitoris.
“God, that feels fantastic.” She sighed as he worked at it. She closed her eyes and tried to relax but all she could see behind her lids was Jake, hurt and annoyed stomping off after their dance ended. She fought desperately to put the vision out of her mind but it kept resurfacing, agitating her and preventing her from being calm enough to let herself go. Until she did there would be no release. She took a deep breath and pictured nothing in her head … Derek … she said loudly in her mind. Think about Derek … not long after that she felt her body respond and a huge wave of pleasure crashed over her. Her fingers tightened into his curls as an automatic response and once she had relaxed Derek let her go and crawled up on top of her. He pushed her thighs apart with his knees and entered her slowly.
“How’s that baby?” He asked giving her more until he was buried to the hilt. She groaned.
“Oh Derek, that’s good.” She said. Pleased at hearing it he began to make love to her slowly then quickly then slowing it down some. As his own pleasure built up he closed his eyes and pressed his mouth against hers. She consumed his mouth in feverish kisses and within moments his orgasm peaked and he released inside her in hot, shooting spurts. “Oh baby …” She moaned as he bucked with every throb. Once he had settled he rolled off and sighed. She curled into him and he wrapped an arm around her.
“Now we’re properly man and wife.” He said and blew air out of his mouth. She grasped his left hand and turned his wedding ring around and around on his finger.
“Yes we are.” She said softly and closed her eyes.
Alexandra awoke with a start and ran a hand through her hair. It was damp. It was then that she found her nightshirt soaked around the neckline and clinging to her body. It was still dark and she could see the outline of the full moon through the sheers that covered the sliding glass door. Glancing towards the other side of the bed her husband was sleeping peacefully, his back to her. Pushing back the covers she slipped out of bed quietly not wanting to wake him and crept out the door to stand on the wooden deck. There was a strong, warm breeze that blew past her whipping her hair around her head and flattening her nightshirt against her body. She leaned her elbows down on the railing and closed her eyes feeling the wind wash over her face. She breathed in the scent of the ocean, a pungent salty smell. She would miss this in a few days when they were gone. A volcano puffed lightly in the distance. She had been dreaming moments ago that she was making love with someone she presumed to be Derek and then in light she saw that was Jake. Her fingers were wrapped in his soft, chestnut hair, his mouth was on hers, his body pumping against her. She moaned. Why wouldn’t he leave her alone? She slipped her fingers into her hair and pressed them against her damp scalp. She let go and looked up at the bright moon. Because she had always been infatuated with him, from the day she met him … he had a charm and wit that she was magnetically attracted to not to mention his soft features, large, brown dusky eyes, pouting lips and compact, sexy ass. She had been jealous of Jovie since they had begun dating but once she met Derek she thought she was over him. And her resolve had been strong, feelings kept in tact … until the day of her wedding when he came out and told her how he felt about her. Why couldn’t he have said something long before now … she asked herself and sighed heavily. Just then the door behind her opened and Derek stepped out naked onto the deck. Alex glanced around nervously but there was no one else within miles. He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her tightly.
“I couldn’t sleep.” She said softly as he nuzzled his stubbled face into her neck. “I had a bad dream.” He nodded.
“I know you did, you were tossing and turning.” She turned to glance at him.
“I was?” She asked. He nodded again.
“And moaning.” Her heart thudded in her chest.
“Was I saying anything?” She asked nervously. He ran his hands down the front of her gown and then back up underneath it.
“No …” he said as he slid his smallish hands up her thighs and then between them. “Come back to bed.” He whispered into her ear and penetrated her with his fingers. She moaned. “On second thought …” He lifted the back of her nightshirt and she opened herself to him. He took her right there on the deck with the ocean lapping at the shore in front of them, the moon shining brightly in the night sky and the breeze caressing their sweat-lined bodies, carrying their voices high into the darkness. By the time they crawled back into bed Alex was fatigued enough that she went right back to sleep, her husband curled up around her back.
CHAPTER THREE
Dave the doorman held the front door of the condo open to Alex and she breezed through.
"Hey Dave. Are they home?" She asked referring to Jake and Jovie. They should have been home from their honeymoon two days ago but she was afraid to call. She wasn't sure she could pull off acting like nothing had transpired between her and Jake not only at her wedding but his. She was dancing with her husband of one week when Jake asked if he could cut in. Derek kissed her on the cheek and went to mingle with the other guests as the groom took her into his arms and pulled her close. She looked up at him, her eyes fearful and guarded. He smiled handsomely. She’d never seen him looking so becoming.
“You look gorgeous.” He said as she gazed into his eyes. Embarrassed she looked away. “Did you have a nice honeymoon?” She nodded slowly.
“Yes. Thank you, it was wonderful.” His fingers lightly played against her back as they danced.
“I want to kiss you right now.” She looked up at him quickly and frowned.
“It’s your wedding day!” She chastised. He laughed softly.
“I can’t help it. If you were a hideous beast with an awful personality it would make things a lot easier you know.” She looked down. “Don’t worry, I won’t kiss you at my own wedding reception but after today all bets are off.” It had been a terribly uncomfortable situation and one that she would have to work out in her head. When Jo had left three messages on her cell phone Alex decided she'd better make an appearance or Jo might begin to suspect something was wrong.
"Yes Ms. Portico, they've been back for a few days now." Dave said pressing the elevator button for her, tipping his cap and then returning to his place at the front door. The elevator arrived and Alex stepped in. As she went to press the button for the fourth floor she noticed her hand trembling. She sighed disgustedly, pressed the button and then held it in her other one.
"Get a grip Alexandra ..." she muttered to herself as the lift ascended. She stood staring at the large foreboding wooden door before getting up the courage to knock. The door swung open and she was greeted by first the surprised face and then the smiling face of Jake. Alex felt her insides turn to mush. He leaned on the edge of the door.
"Well, hello ..." He said in a low voice. Nervously Alex tucked her hair behind her ear.
"Is your wife home?" She said, accentuating the 'wife' part. He opened the door all the way and swept his arm down the hallway indicating she should enter. Alex brushed past him and entered the condo. She waited while he closed the door before meeting her in the hallway that led to the dining room.
"She's not home." He said with a shrug.
"Where is she?" Alex asked glancing around the house.
"She went shopping." He said with a smile. Alex nodded.
"Well would you tell her I stopped by?" She asked. Jake nodded.
"Yes I will. But tell me you're not just going to run away ..." She blushed.
"I suppose we should probably talk about ... umm ... things since she's not here." She said. He nodded again.
"Yes, we should ..." She took a deep breath and just came right out with it.
"Jake, this is just wrong, you and I. If you loved me as much as you say you do then you never should have married Jo. We can't go on like this. As it is I’m afraid to be alone with you." He reached forward, grabbed her hand and pulled her to him.
"I had to marry her, Allie, just like you had to marry Derek. Everything had already been set in motion months ago and by the time I realized how attracted I was to you the invites had been sent out. What was I going to do?" She trembled nervously as she stood there in his arms in the dining room of her best friend's house. Jovie could burst through the door at any minute and catch them there...
"No, Jake, this is wrong on many levels." He kissed her softly. "Jake ..." she protested but before she could say anything else his pressed his mouth on hers again.
"But it's right on many levels too, Allie. Tell me you don't feel something between us ... tell me my kisses don't affect you ..." His lips slid effortless across hers, tickling and as his kisses deepened she fell into him, drunk with a momentary wave of desire. He slipped his tongue between her lips and slid it against hers. She moaned softly and then pressed at his chest.
"Jake, please ..." She begged.
"You want me too, oh God, Allie ... it's there! I felt it." She felt tears stinging beneath her lids and she closed her eyes.
"Can you feel how much I want you?" He pressed his hand against her behind and pushed his hips against her. She felt a large knot safely tucked away under the fabric of his tight jeans. Her heart thumped wildly in her chest as her passion manifested itself between her legs in the form of a warm wetness that was now becoming uncomfortable.
"I can't do this." She said and detached herself from him.
"You can." He said reaching for her. "I've read your novels ..." He pulled her into his arms again. "I know that stuff you write is about me." Her eyes opened wide and her mouth dropped open in surprise.
"What?" She gasped incredulously. He smiled and dipped his head to her ear.
"It's quite obvious. At least to me." She laughed.
"You are delusional." He searched her eyes.
"Am I?" He pressed his lips against hers and for a moment she accepted the kiss but coming to her senses pushed him away.
"You've got to stop doing that!" She said touching her lips gently with the tips of her fingers as if they had just been burned by something very hot.
"Why? Because you enjoy it? Because you want me as much as I want you?" She clicked her tongue and sighed.
"No! Because all of this is wrong, Jake, if Jo and Derek knew they would be so hurt."
"Well I'm certainly not going to tell them. How would they know? It's just you and me here right now." She glanced around uncomfortably.
"I have to get going. I-I can't be here alone with you." He moved forward slowly as she backed away and before she knew it she was pressed up against the wall that separated the dining room from the front hallway. Her breath was coming in short gasps and her hands trembled at her sides. Jake ran his hands up her arms to her shoulders and then tickled her neck lightly before sliding them into her hair.
"You are so beautiful." He whispered. "I've never felt this way about anyone before. Ever." She looked into his eyes and licked her lips. Her desire for him was overwhelming and leaving her breathless. "It's there Allie ... I see it. You are fighting it. Why don't you stop fighting me?" He leaned forward to kiss her but she turned her head. Instead he kissed the side of her face down to her ear and then planted tiny, wet kisses on her neck.
"I-I'm fighting because it's wrong! You have to know its wrong! We're married!" She stammered then slipped away from him. "I really have to go! Please tell Jo I stopped by." She said as she headed quickly for the door.
"Allie, wait!" He called as she pulled open the front door and escaped. The door slammed and then she was gone. Jake sighed and pinched his lips together. She had been wearing some sort of flavored lipstick, it was grape ... it tasted good. He frowned. She would come to her senses, he thought to himself. Hopefully. She wanted him as badly as he wanted her - he was sure of it; he felt it in the way she kissed him back, her soft moan ... she was denying her attraction but she would come around ... eventually. And he decided he would wait however long it took. He was a patient man. He'd never been this enraptured by anyone in his life and he wasn't about to let it go easily. It would just take some convincing on his part. Was he up to the challenge? He smiled. He sure was!
Alex sat in the driver's seat shaking uncontrollably and rested her head on the steering wheel. Her encounter with Jake was more then she'd bargained for and obviously couldn't handle. She felt tears welling up inside her but they wouldn't come. She felt a lump in her throat and swallowed hard trying to disperse it. Her breathing was coming in fast and short spurts and before long she began to feel dizzy and lightheaded. She sat up and took a deep breath of air expanding her lungs and drinking in oxygen. "Oh my God ..." she sighed. "He's trying to kill me, I'm sure of that now." She looked around and after not seeing anyone recognizable she began to sob. Grabbing tissues from the tissue box holder in her center console she blew her nose and dabbed at her wet eyes careful not to smear the mascara around her eyes making her look like a drunken raccoon. She breathed in deeply through her nose ... she could still smell his spicy cologne, the feeling of his hands on her, his mouth ... She shook her head violently trying to banish the thoughts that were washing over her, making her warm with desire. "Get a grip, Alex." She said to herself. She had promised herself she wouldn't react to his advances no matter how bad it got. And it had gotten pretty bad in there; if she hadn't fled when she did they would have ended up in bed and probably caught. She couldn't risk that. I am a married woman, I am a married woman ... she said it over and over trying to convince herself more than anything else. She started the car and pulled away from the curb. She thought about Derek ... he was the sweetest, kindest, most soft-spoken man she'd ever known. And he loved her, really loved her. He loved her before they had sex for the first time. He loved her when she first got up in the morning, her hair kinked from sleep, eyes tired and red, and without makeup on. Her heart ached for him now. It wasn’t a long drive from Jake and Jovie’s to her own condo where she and Derek had taken up residence and before long she pulled into the private parking garage and then headed towards the elevator. She let herself into the house and tossed her keys and purse down on the credenza by the door.
“Derek?” She called. She heard him playing the guitar in the study and burst in. He jumped at the noise.
“What? What is it?” He asked, a worried look had crossed over his handsome face. Setting down the guitar quickly he was ready when she leapt into his arms. He held her tightly then pulled back and looked at her quizzically. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong or do I have to guess?” She smiled and kissed him passionately. “Forget it, I don’t want to know. Just kiss me again like that.” She pressed her mouth against his, her tongue running along his bottom lip. He sucked it into his mouth and pressed his own against hers. She crawled into his lap and ran her hands through his hair. He undressed her quickly and took her right there on the floor in the den and afterwards she lay across his chest and toyed with the light curls that matted it. “What got you so riled up that you had to jump me when you got home?” He asked after some time. She shrugged and ran her fingers up his chest to his shoulder then up his neck to his chin.
“I just missed you.” She said and rubbed her finger across the blonde stubble that he’d been cultivating for a few days. He sighed and pinched her nose.
“Well I missed you too. How’s Jo?” He asked. She felt a sharp pain in her belly that caused her to flinch. She covered it up by scratching her side.
“She wasn’t home.”
“I’m sorry.” He said.
“What are you sorry for?” She asked lifting her head and peering up at him. He pulled her up and on top of him.
“That you went all that way for nothing.” He said softly and then kissed her nose. She smiled.
“Yeah, but look what it got you!” He laughed and tucked her head into his shoulder.
“That’s true. You should go out more often.” She uttered a small laugh. On the outside she was laughing but on the inside, her heart ached.
“So how was your honeymoon?” Alex asked Jovie.
“It was wonderful! We lay on the beach, rode bikes, drank lots and lots of strawberry margaritas. I have a fantastic tan! You should see it! Oh that’s right, you would have but you came over when I wasn’t home!” Alex felt a pang of guilt take hold of her and for a moment was silent. “You know I got home right after you left. I saw you pull away.”
“You’re kidding?” Alex said, feigning surprise. “So why did it take you two days to call me back then?”
“Well, I’ve been busy …” she sighed. “I’ve been meeting with my agent and going over some scripts. There are a few movies I can do, I just have to choose one.”
“That’s pretty cool.”
“Are you writing?” Alex nodded though Jo couldn’t see her through the phone.
“Yeah, I’m trying. It’s hard though with Derek around all the time. He’s just a bit distracting.” She said and then smiled. She giggled.
“I’ll bet. Are you still on your honeymoon? You know … that way?” She asked indicating about newlywed sex.
“Oh God yes, he’s insatiable.” She sighed dreamily. Alex wanted to ask her the same question but was afraid of the answer.
“Jake used to be.” She said. “He’s been very distant lately. I think he’s totally brain dumped since he came off tour. He doesn’t want to do anything. He just sits in front of the TV. It’s getting a little annoying.” Alex blushed guiltily and was glad she was talking to Jo over the phone and not in person.
“Don’t worry, Derek’s appetite will wear off I’m sure and Jake’s will increase once he’s settled.”
“Do you think so?” Alex sighed to herself. She certainly hoped so. Perhaps if she continued to spurn his advances he would eventually tire of the game and go back to Jovie.
“Yeah, I think so.”
“So when are we going out?” Jo asked.
“I don’t know, when do you want to go?”
“How about tonight?”
“Tonight?” Alex asked, confused. She thought Jovie had meant just the two of them but obviously she didn’t …
“Yes, how about the four of us go downtown and have dinner?” Alex felt her body tense at the suggestion.
“No, not tonight.” She said trying to think quickly of an excuse. “Derek’s working really hard on his new stuff, I just don’t think he’s up to it.” Jovie sighed.
“Put him on the phone, I’ll ask him myself.” Alex glanced towards the den where Derek was still working on perfecting his guitar riffs.
“He’s really engrossed.”
“Dammit, Alex, I’m bored to shit. I went shopping again this morning, found nothing, came home the same shit I’ve been doing for two days and now you don’t’ even want to get together for dinner.” Jovie whined. Alex bit the nail on her thumb.
“I’m sorry.” She said softly.
“Please?” Jo asked in a little girl voice. Alex sighed. She didn’t know if she could stand to see Jake again today. She felt the awful burden of guilt and she hadn’t really done anything to be ashamed of. Reluctantly she gave in.
“Fine. I’ll ask Derek but I can’t promise anything.”
“Thank you!” Jovie gushed. Alex said she would call her back and hung up the phone.
Jovie knelt down on the floor in front of the couch and stuck her head up in front of Jake’s face to get his attention. He looked around her and changed the channel on the TV. She made a face and crossed her eyes. He chuckled softly and put his hand over her eyes.
“That really looks weird, you shouldn’t do that.” He said stopping on The Discovery Channel.
“Hey, babe …” She said pushing her way into his arms. He stopped what he was doing and looked at her.
“What?” He asked, somewhat impatiently.
“What do you want to do tonight?” She asked leaning her head against his chest. He wrapped one arm around her and changed the channels on the TV with the other.
“Not a damned thing.” She sighed.
“Why not?” He took a deep breath before speaking. Why not? Because I’ve had a rough day, that’s why not. Thanks to you Allie won’t give me the time of day, is that a good enough reason for you … he thought, his jaws clenched.
“I’m tired, Jo. I don’t feel like going anywhere.”
“I thought maybe you, me, Alex, and Derek could have dinner somewhere then maybe walk along the beach …” She said softly. He perked up at the sound of Alex’s name.
“Did you ask Alex already?” He asked, careful to calm his voice when he spoke about her. She nodded against him. “And what did she say? Do they want to?”
“Alex is going to check with Derek and call me back.” She pulled her head away from him and eyed him suspiciously. “You have all this energy all of a sudden …” she said flatly. He pulled her to him and stroked her hair lightly.
“Well it’s just more fun going out with another couple then when it’s just us sometimes, you know?” She sighed and nodded.
“I know. I hate to admit it but I know.” Just then her phone rang. She got up and sprinted across the living room to retrieve it from where she’d left it. She answered it right before it went to voice mail. “You will?” She said excitedly when Alex told her that they would go out with them. “I’m glad. Jake is glad too. We’ll get ready and come over to your place then we’ll all go out.” She hung up the phone and walked back into the living room. Jake was already up off the couch and in the bedroom changing. Jovie joined him.
Derek opened the door to the condo and welcomed Jake and Jovie into their “humble abode.” He hugged Jovie and shook Jake’s hand.
“How are you two?” He asked, his Australian accent coming through loud and clear. Jovie sighed to herself. It was downright sexy and she envied Alex for that. If the two had switched places, he could bed her in a heartbeat with that lilt. She looked around the condo … Derek’s gold records were plastered on the wall in the hallway. Impressive to say the least.
“We’re good.” Jake said simply. “Where’s your lovely wife?” He asked planting his hands on his hips and sweeping the room with his eyes. Noticing the records and other accents from Australia he decided that their home wasn’t as feminine as Jovie had made theirs and it made him somewhat melancholy.
“My lovely wife is in our bedroom getting ready. Would you two like something to drink? God knows how long she’ll be.” Derek said with a smile and a wink. Jovie watched him with an ardent interest.
“Nothing to drink for me.” Jake said and wandered around the living room peeking at books on the shelves wishing he could sneak into the bedroom and catch Allie dressing.
“How are you, Jovie?” Derek said quietly as she stood near him. He kept one eye on Jake and with the other eyed her with interest. She felt herself blush furiously.
“Umm … I’m very good, thank you Derek. I hear you’re busy playing the guitar.” He nodded.
“It’s my latest passion.” He said and then as Alex emerged from the bedroom, “besides my lovely wife of course.” She smiled at him and tucked her hair behind her ear not noticing that Jake was standing right behind her. He cleared his throat. Startled, she jumped and instantly felt herself trembling.
“Hi Jake.” She said softly. He smiled and looked her up and down, not caring if anyone else noticed.
“Hi Allie.” He replied and then moved towards her. She stiffened as he embraced her briefly. She moved away from him and into the waiting arms of her husband who was very sexy in a light blue button down shirt and a pair of denims that were ripped at the knees.
“Shall we go?” He asked and after wrapping his arm around Alex’s neck and kissing the side of her head. She nodded. He held the door open. “Jovie?” He said and indicated the door. She smiled as she breezed past him. Alex went next followed by Jake. Derek closed and locked the door then joined the others at the elevator.
Jovie chose the most popular of all the restaurants in Beverly and much to Alex’s embarrassment she made sure the maitre d’ knew that both the Conroys and the Harris’s were there. She knew that he would alert the paparazzi as soon as he’d seated them and they would be in the gossip rags the next day. While the other 3 sat Alex excused herself to go to the restroom and when she came back to the table found that the only seat available to her was next to Jake. She eyed Derek and he jumped up and pulled her chair out for her. She blushed. She hadn’t meant for him to leap out of the comfort of his chair to hold her chair, she was just mystified as to why he sat across from her and not next to her. She sat thanking him softly and then he sat.
“I took the liberty of ordering you a drink darling.” Derek said to her and then winked. She smiled at him.
“Thank you sweetie.” Just then the waiter brought their drinks. Silence fell over the table as the four of them perused the menu. Suddenly Alex felt something brush against the side of her thigh and looked down to see Jake pressing his leg against hers. She flushed hotly and glanced at Derek. He had been looking down at the menu in his lap and looked up flashing his blue eyes at her.
“See anything you like?” He asked softly. She smiled nervously. His eyes went back to looking at the menu. “What do you want?” She felt a poke at her leg and glanced over to Jake who was staring at her. Her face turned pink and she looked down quickly. She tucked her hair behind her ear and found her hand was trembling. Setting the menu down on the table she held her hands together clasped in her lap. Alex wasn’t sure she would be able to survive the meal sitting next to Jake who touched her constantly. Her stomach was in knots and she didn’t feel like eating anything. When it came time to order the meal she ordered a salad just so that Derek wouldn’t know something was wrong. And as the waiter collected the menus and excused himself, Jake pretended to stretch and casually slipped his arm over the back of her chair. Alex sighed and reached out her hand to Derek for comfort. He took it and held it tightly rubbing his thumb over her knuckles.
“So, I’m going to start filming soon.” Jovie said breaking the silence that had fallen again over the table.
“That’s fabulous.” Derek said with a charming smile. “What’s the movie going to be about?” She shrugged.
“Well there are like four of them I have to choose from. I’m not sure which one I’ll choose.”
“That sounds ex …” Alex began and then jumped when she felt Jake’s fingers playing with her back. “Excellent.” She said and smiled. “Any wonderful locations this time?” Jo nodded.