A Favor for Amber
Copyright 2011 – Austin James / Bad Penny Press
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A Favor for Amber
“So, how’s the dating scene going?”
I turned to see my sister step into the kitchen. She came up to me and gave me one of her usual kisses on my neck as she hugged me from behind.
“Oh, same old, same old,” I said, shrugging my shoulders. “You know, fighting off all of the girls at school and keeping the phone turned off so I don’t have to deal with Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Angelina Jolie all fighting over me.”
“Angelina, too?” Amber asked with an arched eyebrow. “I thought that she and Brad were inseparable.”
“That’s what she wants everyone to think,” I said, emphasizing my point with a stab in the air of my peanut butter smeared knife. “You know how ruthless the tabloids can be. If they learned of her lust for me, it’d go worldwide overnight.”
“Oh, poor Brad!” Amber cried in mock distress. “What ever would he do without his precious Angie?”
“Poor Brad?” I snorted as I returned my attentions to the sandwich I was working on. “How about poor me? Brad would probably have me killed in a heartbeat, Am.”
“Maybe not kill you,” Amber chuckled, “but he’d probably have you fucked up pretty bad, for sure.”
“Ya think?”
“And then he’d have you hung up by your useless balls for all the paparazzi to photograph,” she said with an evil smirk.
“Ow!” I said, suddenly feeling a twinge of pain in my nut sack. “I don’t know what just hurt worse; my balls or you telling me my balls are worthless.”
Amber briefly glanced at my crotch and pursed her lips in apparent thought. An odd smile appeared briefly on her face, than passed just as quickly.
“I have no idea of the value of your balls, big brother, so don’t take it personally.”
“Well,” I said, cutting the sandwich in two, “they’re worth a lot to me, so I’d like to keep them right where they are, thanks.”
I offered Amber half of the peanut butter and jelly sandwich I had just made. She hoisted herself onto the kitchen counter and crossed her long legs as she took the proffered sandwich half.